i know i promised highlights from my birthday roast, which was composed entirely from gmail and gchat archives. i thought i could post a few snippets here, but then i re-read the notes and realized a few things:
1) i can never run for public office.
2) without google’s archives, my memory bank would be empty.
3) my friends are so much cooler and prettier than yours. seriously, i’m lucky to have this loyal army of skanks.
